Thursday, October 31, 2013

My thoughts

Last night Chloe was sleepless. Tired with her blocked nose.. and neverending cough.
I also cannot sleep well. I hope she is getting well soon... but it seems the cough getting from bad to worse.
This afternoon, Xinlong bring her to see doctor one more time. and to get her nebulised and x-rayed.

I hate it. I hate this moment when I am working (in office) and cant help but thinking about how it will be better if I have the time to clean my house more often, clean our bedroom more, tidy it all, and all that sort of things which might help in keeping my Chloe healthy.

Truth is, the more I do, the more it get messed. Just like that. It only last 10minutes.. or less than that.
I am exhausted. Sometimes I feel I am alone in this journey of parenting... or mothering. Everyone seems getting it right.

Lord help me please.

Thursday, October 24, 2013

Tuesday, October 22, 2013

In the midst of my hectic daily life..

I wish I have more time for myself...
to sleep
to cuddle my daughter
to play with her
read with her
sing with her
and by end of the day.. I wish I had more time to be with her.
but this is how it goes in my real life.

7.30am to 7.30pm go to work.
8pm dinner
8.30 - 9.30pm play with my daughter, I take a bath
10pm laundry & cleaning time (my daughter will be on the bed with her ipad)
11.30 pm Chloe sleeps, I am exhausted
12 midnite, we all sleep..
....
3am I wake up, to have a 'me time' which is sewing
5.30am tired but contented. and fall asleep once more..
till morning (7am) comes and I'm ready to start another day.

Yes, it is hectic ..
but I am a working mom. and mothering never ends when my day jobs end.
For a full time mom, I envy you for having so much time for you and your kids.
Yes I know it is tiring but it is understandably worth more than anything in the world.. at least by my opinion.
I hope I can be JUST a full time mother.
But for now... full time working mother is what I do.